5 years old:
Annika points to the floor where she has made a huge mess.
“Look, Mommy- a big mess! But don’t worry...You’ll clean it up!”
Annika asked if she could go outside and I said no. She got upset, shook her head slowly and said, “You are a strange, sad little man!”
Me: “No, you JUST had mashed potatoes!”
AK: “No, that have been HOURS ago!”
when exasperated: “Oh, for quiet out loud!”
her version of a curse word is “Oh brudduhs…”
Actual conversation:
AK: Want to play a game?
Me: Sure, what?
AK: It’s a game I made up, called ‘Nut Dazzle’
Me: Uh, how do you play?
AK: Just follow the mystery, man!
For Christmas Annika asked for a credit card, a banana split and a metal detector
AK: Laundry is hard work!
Me: Well, hard work is good!
AK: What are you, a vegetarian??
Me: It’s cool
AK: What?
Me: I said, it’s cool
AK: You sound like you’re from the 90’s
(While we were writing something together)
AK: “Will you take away the s’s and the e’s? Because I don’t like them, and they’re for smart combos.”
Annika was watching some of those British guards on TV that never move and we were telling her how they can never move, talk or smile. “Wow, being a guard is like my worst nightmare!”
AK: “I’m Annika Fashion Style! And you are Mommy Fashion Style!”
Me: “What about Daddy?”
AK: “No, he just works at the shoe store.”
“Snow White and the THREE Dwarves. That’s what I call it for short.”
AK: “One of my favorite colors is bleige.”
Me: “You mean beige?”
AK: “No, I mean BLEIGE!”
Me: “What does it look like?”
AK: “Well, I haven’t seen it in a while, so I don’t remember. But I DO love bleige.”
“All of the BSBSS- that spells CoCo Puffs!”
Rhys was acting super crazy and Annika looked at him then over to me and Mimi and said, “Looks like he has a case of the Stewie Bensons”
Me: If you had a cat, what would you name it?
AK: Scrammy
Me: If you had a monkey, what would you name it?
AK: Bananapants
Me: If you had a dog, what would you name it?
AK: Carlos
We recently celebrated a really cool Jewish Passover Seder dinner at my parents’ house w our Bible study group. We did all the actual traditions and it was a whole, long ceremony. I prepped her and tried to get her excited by saying how this was a very ANCIENT ceremony, how it was very special because it was thousands of years old- maybe 3500 years old. Totally deadpan she said, “Oh, so when Poppy was a kid?”
Annika decided she wanted to do a big, elaborate prank on Adam. We spent over an hour searching the whole house for every single small toy we could find, and spent even more time carefully duct taping each one all over his tall, stand-up fan, until every surface was covered w all these toys and it looked totally crazy.
Annika commented, “This is gonna be the CWANK of the CENTUWWY!”
Later she worried that maybe we had cwanked him TOO hard!
“I think Mommy is 16 years old. That’s how tired she acts.”
On the day of Cameron’s high school graduation:
Rhys: Today is boring day!
AK: Oh yes. Today is HORRIBLE!
Annika walked in on Adam eating a hot dog wiener (by itself) and some Cheetos and he immediately looked guilty. Annika shook her head slowly and said, “Oh, Daddy… there is SO MUCH you don’t understand about this world!”
AK: I need a cheese stick!
Me: Go get one!
AK: I need you to get it for me!
Me: Why?
AK: Because I don’t trust myself to do it.
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